The difficulty of adult dating was brought home to me the other day.
My 20-year-old nephew came to live with me and my kids, until he can get on his own two feet financially. His hometown – my hometown is really small… providing little opportunity to someone looking to get started in life on the right foot.
He spends his days looking for a job, and now and again, he will slip out in the evening time.
I never really gave much thought about his evening time getaways. He is an adult – he can do what he wants to do with his own time.
But by chance, I asked him the other evening if he had gone to that bar that allows 18-year-old’s to enter. He said he had not. He explained that he did not feel comfortable enough with finding his way around town, to be able to find the bar without getting lost.
A bit surprised, I asked him where he went on Friday night…
His answer was even more surprising…
He was going out to meet girls his own age… Starting conversations in convenience stores, restaurants, and WAL-MART!!! Until now, I knew that you could find anything you ever wanted at Wal-Mart… I just never stopped to think of it as a place to meet new women… 
I have to give him credit for creativeness…
My nephew is at that somewhat awkward age – after high school and before he has turned 21. He is also in a new place, where he does not know his way around town, and in a town where he does not know anyone but our family and our small circle of friends, all of whom are at least ten years older and with children.
I do the online dating thing, but to my knowledge, he is not exploring the prospects for online dating in our town… And even if he did, although we are in a bigger town than the one he came from, we are still living in a mid-sized town with limited dating possibilities. I know this is true, because even though I find people to date in the town I live in – through online dating sites – I frequently date people from nearby small towns as well.
His mother – my sister – having been a single mother for most of the last ten years seems to have taught my nephew the importance of starting conversations to lead to that next date. His mother has not had Internet access since she and my nephew’s dad were divorced. So while I was exploring the big beautiful world of online dating, she was still dating the old-fashioned way.
Ten years down the road, my sister has found a replacement for her first husband and now she has a new baby at home, nineteen years younger than her first child. I tease her that she finally got her kid raised and out of the house, and now she has to do it all over again…
At first I thought that until my nephew gets into a regular job, a regular church, and a regular daily routine, I suspected that it will be somewhat difficult for him in the dating world. But then again, maybe not… He actually already has a list of phone numbers he has acquired on his evening time adventures…
In this day and age, many people think of online dating as the quickest and most economical way to find someone worth spending their time… But as my nephew has reminded me… There was a time before the Internet, and those dating techniques used before the Internet age actually still work today…
So the next time you are out on the town and you meet someone who strikes your fancy, walk up to them and say Hi. Show interest and it could lead to a phone number. Finally, with a phone number in hand, follow up. You never know where that phone call might take you and your heart’s interest…
This article published here.
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Lance Metzger writes about relationships, offline and online dating. In our minds, “No Strings Attached” simply means, “Let’s get to know one another before we start making any commitments to one another.” To explore internet dating, please visit the NSA Dating Site at: http://www.nsadatingsite.com/
Read more articles written by Lance Metzger
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